It is Okay to Have Personal Time in Relationships and Marriage

One of the things that I look forward too (most of the time) is coming home to my husband! He will listen to my complaints, hug me, play with me and just make my day all around better. However, apart from men and women being different, as individuals, we have our own things we like to do and enjoy. And honestly, sometimes your spouse, boyfriend/girlfriend or whoever just won’t enjoy that hobby or thing you like to do.

First, if you are the type of person that wants your spouses or partners attention at all times, believe me, I understand, but we have to learn that it is okay if they have their own personal quality time, as well as yourself. It is good for recharging yourself mentally, spiritually, physically or any way that you need. Life is difficult and sometimes it isn’t always easy coming home and having to exhaust even more energy in caring for your significant other, kids, or any other duties you may have. If you’re a stay at home mom (or dad) I am sure you are patiently waiting for your spouse to get home so you can put your feet up for just a second. It is okay. You shouldn’t feel guilty and you shouldn’t make your spouse or significant other feel guilty either. Obviously, there is a proper time and place for it all.

If you don’t have a hobby or something that you like to do and feel left out at times or are searching for something, don’t fear! Let me share some of the things Dylan and I do to maybe give you some ideas or try them for yourself!

Esmeraldas Hobbies:

  1. Sewing: I love to sew! That should be obvious from some of the stuff I’ve made on here (cocktail dress, summer dress) and some of the stuff that I am working on that you will see in the very near future.
  2. Baking/Cooking: Something that is therapeutic, as well as fun, is baking and cooking! I’ve always loved baking and was my job for a bit and I love making and finding new recipes to make my own! I will have a post coming up about one of my favorite (as well as Dylan’s) cookies! And if you haven’t seen it yet check out my homemade Mexican salsa recipe!
  3. T.V Show: Something that is really helpful to me is being able to watch the T.V by myself for a bit. Right now I am watching Vampire Diaries and Dylan doesn’t like it (though he will occasionally say, “what’s Clouse up to?”). But during that time, I get to watch something I enjoy, I get privacy, I can scroll through Pinterest, play our Switch or whatever I want to do in private and peacefully.

Dylan’s Hobbies:

  1. Music: Since Dylan was young he has been playing music, he was in a band all through high school (check this video out from his freshman year of high school) and today still plays and writes music. This is a really private and personal time for him, so I do my best to not bug him while he is writing music. He will occasionally play at places, but not much since moving to Vegas. You can check out his SoundCloud, he tries to put his new songs up there every month or so.
  2. Video Games: I know a lot of people say they are bad, but if you know Dylan you know his brain is always going or thinking of something. Whether it is a business venture, work, or whatever he is constantly thinking and honestly it is hard for him to just sit down for a second, so I have to sit him down and tell him to shut his brain off, which he does through video games and I find nothing wrong with that. He is hard-working and deserves to shut his brain off every now and then. Right now he wants to get Red Dead Redemption 2, anyone playing it?
  3. Graphic Design: Dylan does graphic design on the side for fun and occasionally some friends/businesses for anyone who reaches out to him. It allows him to enjoy listening to music while being creative and it is relaxing for him and not so much work. You can see some of his designs here and buy his current stickers here!

It is important to have personal time and for every individual to respect others personal time, even in relationships and marriage. It is what honestly keeps us sane and helps us relax in the way we want to relax when others can’t for whatever reason. What are some of your hobbies? Keep an eye out for some of my hobbies come to life in future posts!

One thought on “It is Okay to Have Personal Time in Relationships and Marriage

  1. I think it’s so important and this is me not everyone feels this way husbands and wives don’t have to do anything apart from one another But your own personal time for yourself, you recharge and energize your body mind and spirit. You can laugh with your girlfriend in ways you can’t with your husband and that’s ok because you grow a deeper appreciation for your relationship and each other’s unique qualities and we all have them some we love and others we tolerate. But for me it allows some personal reflection on what I want to accomplish and who I am and who want to be.


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